#30before30 – Professional Dirty Dancers

After my pole dancing experience I gained a newfound respect (sort of) for strippers. It is really hard work to hoist yourself up on a pole and have enough control to spin around it and look graceful and sexy! When I used to tell people that I had never been to a strip club before, they honestly could not believe it. So I figured, I should knock this one off my list, after all I was sort of curious to see how it would be possible for someone to be sexy/graceful on a pole without ending up with bruises and wounds like I did.

I actually thought it was going to be much easier to recruit someone to go on this adventure with me but to my surprise, not many people were too into it. Good thing for my trusty friend Mohsin, he agreed to come with me for my first strip club experience. We went to Amazons on St. Jacques, what a classy joint! The place smelled like the Selwyn House locker rooms (don’t ask me how I know that) and it was empty except for a bunch of creepers. It was pretty early on a Sunday night, so I wasn’t expecting a crazy crowd but I thought people would be there as a way to unwind after a weekend. Mohsin proceeded to explain to me how the whole operation works, do you know that the girls pay to perform on stage and then they get to keep whatever they make from the dances/tips? I had no idea these girls were so entrepreneurial!

The girls at this place looked like they could play back-up for the Alouettes, some of them had shoulders that were twice the size of my hips! Mohsin also informed me that many strip clubs actually offer food, like chicken wings, the thought of it coupled with the nasty chicks and the noxious smell made me gag a little. In any case, there wasn’t a lot of dancing going on, so rather than sit in a stinky bar I figured the best thing to do was have a real experience, as in getting a lap dance. So Mohsin found the smallest not butch girl in the place and asked her to come speak to us, I was thrilled that she was actually half dressed (she had a skirt and boots on) as opposed to the other ridiculous lingerie sets the other girls had on. The lap dance was so awkward I immediately regretted it the moment it started, however, at least I can now say, check, been to a strip club and got a lap dance!